Just finish a pile of series transferring to my comp.. Can't really sleep much... I am tired but can't sleep... I am wondering where and how to say things that is on my mind... And i thought of my old dusty blog. i mean who blog at this era? who would read? This page will not be seen by a lot of people.. Ahahaha (insane laughter). Anyways, end my nursing.course soon. Probably end of this year or this coming March. Well, the date does not matter. I just want to finish this as soon as possible. I had enough of masked strangers who pretend to play monkey for sex, approval, fame, defamation, credits... Bah.. Sick of this reality... Only a few who do good in reality the rest are for show or public relation or for perks. Why is it so hard for Christian to live in today world?? we are challenge by friends, our own ego of seeking attention, difficulty to make a stand or shine in this reality where many forget that what they doing. Instead they do it to feed their pride with thoughts like "Is this person looking at me?" or " Does what i do in church please that person i like or i want to impress to say i did great?" or " I must serve this are because i want to be notice!". Keep bury yourself with pride and self-conscious and you will lead your future to death.

I am not say particularly anyone but i am saying it to everyone including myself. We need to realize that Jesus needs to be the center if it all.

Making a decision to be attracted by individual is again what's happening to me. LoL but old habits and desire dies hard. Trust in Him, i must.

Feeling it!

ahahhaha

damn man i am really feeling doing this post today..

i am going blog about music and movie today and maybe memories.. LOL!

Found a few youtube stars.. it starts off Sam Tsui but not to my satisfactory then i kept on searching and then i found the group of guys who is cool and good with guitars.. totally acoustic..

Dude!! they sound awesome.. they called themselves Boyce Avenue . they are good..

(wonder how much it takes to have all their equipments?- how long does it takes for me to play like that or them?)

Just finish watching My Boyfriends is Tybe B.

Man the main actress reminds me of someone i know personally... Both of them have the smile.. lol

lol cools cute yea??

hmmm.. lately about me study not too good but by God's grace i got through.. haiz.. i need to put in more effort next sem..

well besides studies there are other tiny mini problem but i leave it to God to deal with it one by one.. i mean i can not let this lil problem of ppl who i care hurt me and lost sight of God's will and purpose in my life.

Anyways yesterday i was taking lunch i heard one stranger talking to another stranger about Jesus while he is smoking..

i was thinking in my heart " People like him make Christian name go to waste, Man i wish i can correct Him".

as i finished thinking about it then Holy Spirit gently told me "At least he dont tell false things about God and he dare to tell about the gospel" which is true.

i let myself judge ppl by their outward appearance.. i feel so bad.. so i learn from the Holy Spirit each day.. lol

there is another one..

i posted some video up on Facebook and

a guy from my church youth told me why i post it, MTV!?

then i ask yea? why?

he said Mana Telur Vanish!

i am like dude you ok ah?? and i just laugh my ways out by saying

hahahaha... ok.. have a great night ahead.. lol..

then Holy Spirit told me to dont judge even sometime things might not look or seems your way but let God handle it.. imagine God is my life Manager.. is like you are an actor or singer then he manage your success.. lol..

anyways, bye, will be back soon i guess!

hmmm.. this page have not been alive in awhile.

Gotten into a relationship and then out. i actually tot she would be the one, so kind, thoughtful, beautiful, beyond any word to describe the feeling at the very moment. it have been 4months that we have been apart. still wondering did i hurt her in the end, is life better over there for her, is she still thinking of me or gotten over me? the answer is not what i need to know but it is kinda selfish that i want to know.

Had a great and most memorable day with 2 of my friends. they are both great person. one kindest man i know since we were kids, the other is a great lady of God i know of since kids too.

after looking at their wedding makes me think questions like:

Now i am wondering where is she? is she around the corner? or down the street? i wonder what is she doing now? is she think of God more than i do even i know who she is? if it is then good. Does she have the heart to follow me if my calling was to be a missionary? lol.. scary things to say huh but i need to know that my rest of my life is spend with God together with her. P.S God quickly send her my way.

regrets but moving on

hmmmm within 1 week many things change...

for studies to relationships....

one hour end it all between friends and family....

between one with another...

if u are me what will u do??

and if u know what i did will u talk behind me back??

or will i talk to me and cheer me on??

Friends becomes strangers within the split second....

regards; sad...

*updateds...

hey once again... it have been like months since i came back here to say what i want to say.. lol...
so how have been?? great i guess... lol... well actually i am in a state of being stressed out, tired, happy, sad, disappointed and many stufff... let start with a few stuff...

• me and my bros are doing well.
  
• me and my studies is catching up with each other but a lil tougher now but i can still do it by the grace of GOD.
• me and youth are okay... beginning to see ppl raise up and cry for their nation and other nation, friend facing problem over coming it, some are on the way to over come their own problems, more united in hand and in heart now a days....
• me and friends.. well this one i feel more lonely then ever (some ppl overseas will complain and say that i am maybe being too over-dramatic) well i am thinking that ppl don't want me around.
• me and how i feel about myself, pushing myself for not being the thing i want to see in me like being hard working, cutting down on food, spend more time studying than on facebook or games, to be the top student of my year intake, not try to be boastful of what i have.

just thinking am i good enough to be someone who will get what i want and who i want?? hahhahah i am trying to talk to someone but i got no idea what to talk about, man i feel so lame and so stupid... when i try to talk my brain goes blank man, all that is inside is only the smile i can see in front of me and fear just grab my mouth by the tongue and kick me in the knee and got me shaking. hahhahaah too stupid right?? lol...

back!

hey blogger way here!
it has been 2 full months... and i am sorry it took you ppl so long to wait for me.. i am sorryy
my bad... so anyways wassup?? lol...
me?? well only 4 things in my brain right now...

• God
• Money
• Studies
• Her~

yea! all this is up and december.. wow! i mean really awesome... it is more like the month where i can give my best la... lol... got practices every week... makes me tired and no time to go out la... lol... but anyways maybe after january only i can go out la... movies to catch up, relationships to build, attitude and habits to break, and boundaries to reach!! ahahahhahaa... i feel like i wanna write song for GOD, that he maybe lifted high!

last one week update...

well din update in awhile, lets start with last week friday day

FRIDAY
i went and help out with PISA for MFC and i suddenly been called manager... swt nia... all thanks to alan and jimmy... but i really and greatful to alan, jimmy, joshua, his cousin and sir tatt for helping me with the sign board... Thanks...

SATURDAY
MFC started and was awesome la... got 2 flat screen tv for Games... look just like WCG... lol... and i was happy get to see her... lovely... lol... and i want to glorify our GOD... i got my job without an interview... fuh-yoh.. the manager suppose to come and give me an interview but he drag too long.. for almost 1 1/2 hours i waited and he still not there... and someone call him and he just said i got the job and dont need to interview... LOL!! Praise Be Unto HIM!

SUNDAY
after second service went to gurney for my last sunday movie for the year since i got the job... hang out with two girls and watch Imagine That... nice, funny, and touching story la... should watch....

MONDAY
Merdeka! merdeka! merdeka! it have been the 3rd year i havent sing anyone of the anthem !! lol... din do much... when to a werehouse sells and i found a lot of nike and adidas shoe but no money so cant buy... all very cheap nia.... but i bought a jacket... i like it...!

TUESDAY
first day of work... kinda nervous because all malay worker... and when they dont smile they are scary... but then at last when they joke and ask me a lot of funny stuff, they are fun guy to hang out and work with! i thanked GOD my work place is less pressured and such a friendly atmosphere...

WEDNESDAY
2nd day learn how to do topping but only do for one pizza but learn how to wash the hot oven... and i learn lot from it... and i was hungry because i din have my lunch and u know what i got to eat free pizza because there was one napalian worker and he did mistake la.. so free pizza for me alone... because it is puasa month, and my malay friends cant eat.. so they offer me they whole pizza... GOD knows it when u are hungry! fuh-yoh!! HE is awesome... had practise for I.G.Nite at night and Jimmy was the joker of the night as usually... but i got something so say, if u know who u are... while ppl are praying, everyone except u are respecting GOD, WHY are u in a rush that u need to keep ur equipment while ppl are praying to YOUR GOD YOU ARE SERVING??

THURSDAY
i got transfer to a nearer place.. so now i work at dominos near denise's house... i walk to work today... and between 30 to 45 minutes... lol... and today is like tuesday... new ppl with new atmosphere and yet i make friends with malay ppl and more la... it was fun working there la... i made like 5 pizza today!! woohoo!!! Praise the Lord!

got to go rest for now... update about my stuff another day ok?? lol...